I am Trying

Put myself in your shoes?

No, I can’t

the same way you will never be able to walk in mine

but as I lay down just the other night I closed my eyes and tried to imagine the terror you felt as they took me away 

or the gut-wrenching numbness when you returned home to get back to "normal"

merely looking at your parents’ faces and internalizing their insulting remarks while knowing their unforgiving, 

blind eyes had thrown away a piece of your soul

wondering through the years how I was

would I understand? forgive? judge? accept?

or would I be the one to walk away?

I am trying

and it hurts me to think of you so very alone and in so much pain just as I have been

No, I don’t think I could ever walk in your shoes and you will never be able to walk in mine

but maybe if we now walk together we will find that peace, that place that will keep us forever as an unconditional family.